My big deadline at work passed so things are a lot more chill right now. Life is good. Here's a screenshot of what my work computers are looking like right now. I'm spending a lot more time on the top screen than on the bottom. I would've hit 7 chat windows at once except Tom's too busy doing some voluntary architecture competition.

I'm also listening to a lot of Lykke Li. The songs "I'm good I'm gone" and "Tonight" are pretty awesome.

And since I'm still procrastinating, here's a few of the choice chat comments on my screen right now.

"the little girls scare me"

"that's the last time I give you advice"

"maybe him and ella can hook up"

"well you can refilm again later when you have more time"

"I'd watch it"

and finally this gem...

"too many people checking you for back fat?"

Alright time to stop screwing around to I can go home early.

Anyone watch The Biggest Loser: Couples? I've never watched the previous versions of the show before, but this season I'm kinda hooked. To be able to work out all day for weeks on end with a personal trainer sounds awesome. Your whole goal in life then is to better yourself physically. How great would that be? It kinda motivates me to work out more.

Oh, and the trainer Jillian Michaels? hubba hubba.

She's like a taller less drunk Paula Abdul.

Oh and babies with mustaches? Absolutely hilarious. Well done Gabe.

Do you know a guy who is always making your mom jokes? As in you say "blah blah blah" and he says "You mom blah blah blah." Well I certainly do know that guy.

The best "your mom" joke though came from a couple Tom and I know. I think the setup was the dude had cut himself, and then bandaged it up.

Husband: It's not bleeding anymore.
Wife: Your mom's not bleeding anymore.

It was funny, and true.

I don't know if anyone has noticed, but there's some pretty ridiculous photos over in the flickr sidebar. Usually it's just whatever pictures Tom, lazyJ, and I decide to send from our phones, but once in a while it takes on a whole new dimension. It started some time last year when lazyJ was bored and posted this:

Tom saw lazyJ's picture, and posted the same thing + headphones:

Then it was my turn, and I went with headphones + shades, although my headphones didn't show up well:

That was the end of round one. We had a good laugh, and then forgot about it. Then around comes 2008, and Tom decided to grow a ridiculous mustache as a joke. He snapped this pic before shaving it off:

I countered with a mustache made out of a cat's tail. Don't worry, it was still attached to the cat.

LazyJ has a beard, so he got creative and um...used mascara to highlight the mustache part. Plus he added an eye patch AND a hook hand. Oh man it was on!!

At that point Tom adds a monkey on his shoulder and a bandana, and substitutes a serving fork hand for a hook hand. Which really in some cases might be more useful.

My turn rolled around again, and I did pig, bandana, and double eye patches. Except my eye patches sucked. Oh and I went meat tenderizer instead of hook or fork. Cause that's how I roll. Also my mustache was a flattire pen. (if you want one let me know)

And there it is, the second flickr war. I just noticed though that both times that it ended when it was lazyJ's turn, which I think means he loses.

The great thing about flickr wars is you never know when they're gonna happen. Next time it looks like one's starting we might post the super secret email address to use so EVERYONE can participate. I mean what could be more fun than making fun of everyone else? Nothing really.

Ps. Taking pictures of yourself while wearing two fake eyepatches is very difficult.

My bro is over in the middle east right now freeing the shit out of people. When he's not doing that though, he's getting his picture taken with celebrities like Miss USA Rachel Smith and Robin Williams.

Robin Williams looks sweaty. USA! USA! USA!

Man, I was cute. I have no idea why I didn't get more (i.e. any) action from the ladies.

And here's a bonus:

peace&love,
lazyJ

3 things:
1) Tom had sweet hair
2) I had/have a really long neck
3) LazyJ needs to dig up some old pictures too

This couldn't wait until Friday.

Sunday night I quickly glanced at my emails and saw this:

I was like, hmmm, Counting Crows are coming to town. Cool. The next morning I returned to my email to actually read it and immediately realized my error. Casting Crowns? WTF? Who the hell are they.

Sneaky Christians!

peace&love,
lazyJ

A+ I rule!

I hardly ever actually read any spam emails that I get. But this one showed up in my work account, which doesn't happen very often.

I knew you could get penis enlargers and erection enhancers, but now they are actually selling whole penises?

And oh, yes, how my penis is so often misunderstood...

peace&love,
lazyJ

So recently the GF and I decided to switch sides of the bed. It's mostly a logistical thing relating to the size of the two night stands and who can't keep their crap off the other person's night stand because one of us likes a nice and tidy night stand and not one with crap all over it. It's a long complicated boring story. But it is important to know that I have been sleeping on the same side of the bed for a long time. Even when I was single.

Anyway, the other day while sleeping on the new side of the bed my alarm went off, and I just naturally rolled over to slap the snooze button. But of course, I had forgotten which side of the bed I was on. So, instead of slapping the snooze button. I slapped my GF. Right in the nose.

Thankfully she's a pretty heavy sleeper and wasn't to disturbed by my sudden and slightly forceful slap. I felt really bad. But at least now I can say I've slapped a woman. Domestic abuse just wasn't the awesome rush I thought it would be. But at least I'm no longer a poser when I wear my wife beaters around.

peace&love,
lazyJ

It's 2008! Can you believe it? That also means....(drum roll please)...that flattire.org is 5 years old!

Um...that's all I got. Work is going to suck big time when I go back tomorrow, so probably not a lot of posting from me for a while. Here's some pictures of me I scanned out of my old year books.

Fourth grade me didn't get a lot of action, understandably. Who would've guessed that my mom cut my hair back then in that perfect bowl shape? Let's thank the US Army for my pimp standard issue glasses.

Sixth grade me did ok. Civilian glasses and a new hair style helped.

Eighth grade me was downhill again from sixth grade me. Way downhill. Frumpy hair, braces, and color photography did not help.

I've got 9th and 12th grade yearbook pictures of Tom and I to come when I get a chance. No pictures of lazyJ though because he went to the wrong high school.