The bluriness of the collage is to give it that drunken effect.

Sorry too busy/lazy to post, but this made us laugh. Don't know who the original author was since it was sent from some Venezuelan guy to lazyJ to me. Maybe Kevin Bacon made it.

I think "WTF" needs to be used more often.

This is what happens when the ho shrimp and the pimp shrimp encounter a financial disagreement. He's all "bitch better have my money!" And she's all "Don't be calling me no bitch, shrimp!" And he's all "Shrimp? Nu-unh I know you didn't just call me no shrimp." And that's when he cocks his shrimp gun and takes care of his shrimp biznass. Blamo!

Bitch betta recognize!

So, at my soon to be new residence (Yes, I'm moving out of the flattire mansion and stepping out on my own. Okay, not really, I'm just moving into my GF's little yellow house.) I have lots of new pets.

Her little yellow house is located right by a small wooded area and river. It's really quite lovely. However, we have a lot of natural creatures hanging around. Like raccoons and ... wasps. I believe it's due to the small wooded area or maybe due to it's yellowness. You know, like when you were little and someone told you not to wear yellow during the summer because it would attract bees even though we are talking about wasps I think and you really really really hated getting stung by bees.

We have gone through almost 4 cans of wasp & hornet killer this summer. The last can was used to take down 7 nests being simultaneously built on her front porch. Here are some pictures of each nest taken this weekend.

The thing is, we killed the nests almost a month ago. We left them up to show people, kind of a walk of wasps type thing. But we didn't really have any visitors during that time so I made a video for you. I found it kind of weird that they have been perfectly preserved this whole time. Anyway, it was a lot more fun to walk through when they were all alive, but maybe if you use your imagination you can have the same experience by watching this video of it while they are all dead.

Wasn't this hilarious? I said wasn't this hilarious? You better start fucking laughing...

peace&love,
lazyJ

My second video is a piece I like to call "Blurry Pictures Set to Popular Music." One of the best way to share quality pictures with people is to make prints, scan them, make a video out of them, and then upload the video to youtube. The quality just keeps getting better each step of the way!

I spent two semesters in high school (or was it 3?) in this video class. We had this big video editing room with these giant machines and big knobs and switches that we learned to use. This of course is a worthless skill since now you can do it all on your home computer. My friend Rhett and I quickly learned that you can make any shitty video better by adding music. Man, you should've seen some of the crap we churned out. Oh, and make the videos about your friends, that's fun too.

Now, to the actual video. In the summer of 2002, Tom and I went on a road trip to visit friends and stopped along the way whenever we wanted. We started in Austin, went to Denver, the Grand Canyon, through Vegas, to LA, and then back. We sorta blogged the whole thing on my PDA and made this website afterwards documenting it all, but it's currently down due to my laziness. The whole thing took an hour to read so here's a 2 minute tribute to one badass 4000 mile, 10 day journey. From Austin. To Austin.

Did you catch the awesomeness right at the end? I'm a star wiping fool! The video was done with Nero Vision which is a million times better than Windows Movie Maker (surprise, surprise). Who knows what program I'll use for my third video! Ya'll better stay tuned is all I'm saying. Have a great weekend.

My new thing is making videos. So far I've done two, and they're so awesome it hurts!

The first was a video I secretly took of lazyJ during drum practice. I then used the power of windows movie maker to add a title, a fade in, a fade out, and a surprise right in the middle.

Did you catch the 9-star star wipe to transition from lazyJ to lazyJ? I added that sweet popup text to let you know just in case your eyesight isn't so good. Damn that was amazing.

If I had to do it over, I would've gone with fewer stars. Maybe I'll fix it later and release a director's cut version.